Saturday, February 28, 2009

JAI HO- THE PREQUEL

Following the astonishing success of the movie ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ at the Oscars, Danny Boyle has decided to make a sequel to the movie, which however should be referred to as a prequel to the ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ since it narrates the story of how the slum in Mumbai, which incidentally is the star of the movie, came into existence.



Since the post has been able to obtain the story of the proposed movie, by means we would not like to disclose, we would like to share it with the readers of the post. This way we get saved from watching the movie once it gets released and therefore do not contribute to making Danny Boyle a Millionaire at the expense of a poor India.



Clever! Isn’t it?



The story starts in the year 1757, and the battle of Plassey between nawab Siraj-ud-Daulah and the forces of the East India Company led by Robert Clive.



The British win, as they have applied the time tested formula against the Indians- the formula of stoking the greed of an opponent of the King, who back stabs the king at the crucial moment. Do the name of King Ambhi, Jaichand, Mir Jaffar ring a bell?



What follows is an open plunder of the resources of Bengal.



Robert Clive, who came to India in 1744, at the age of 18, as a ‘writer’ in the East India Company, went back to England in 1760, with a fortune of at least £300,000 and the quit-rent of £27,000 a year. He infact gave his commanding officer in his formative years a stipend of £500 a year for the rest of his life.



Remember we are talking about 1760 A.D!!



Before we begin to wonder what a ‘writer’ was supposed to mean, let me clarify that a ‘writer’ was how a clerk was designated in the East India Company. And no friends, we will not be raising the issue of the contrast of his pay and the disproportionate wealth, since we are narrating the story of a movie and not a documentary.



Anyway life was proceeding smoothly for the English rulers till the battle of Buxar in 1764. Not that it did not proceed smoothly after Buxar, but a war is a war, after all!



The English, glory be to them, won again.



Before 1764, zamindars in Bengal, Bihar & Orissa had been functionaries who merely held the right to collect revenue on behalf of the Mughal emperor and his representative or diwan in Bengal, who in turn would supervise their activity closely and ensure that they were neither lax nor overly stringent.

However, the East India Company, on being awarded the diwani or overlordship of Bengal by the empire following the Battle of Buxar in 1764, found itself short of trained administrators, especially those familiar with local custom and law. As a result, landholders found themselves unsupervised or reporting to officials; consequently the extraction of revenue proceeded unchecked without any regard for future income or local welfare.



The result was that the rulers became detached with the ruled and the intermediaries fattened their bank balance at the expense of the ruler and the ruled. In order to make up for the loss of revenue, the British or the East India Company introduced the Permanent settlement act.



The Permanent settlement act envisaged that the land tax was fixed for perpetuity, irrespective of the vagaries of nature, on which the Indian agriculture was based. So come Rain, famine or high hell, the land holder and the zamindar had to pay the fixed tax. By ensuring that lands were held in perpetuity and with a fixed tax burden, they became a very desirable commodity.



The payment of a fixed tax inspite of the yield from the fields resulted in many zamindars immediately falling into arrears.You could not collect taxes when the flood had washed away everything, could you?

The Company's policy of auction of any zamindari lands deemed to be in arrears created a market for land which previously did not exist. Many of the new purchasers of this land were Indian officials within the East India Company's government. These bureaucrats were ideally placed to purchase lands which they knew to be underassessed, and therefore profitable. In addition their position as officials gave them opportunity to quickly acquire the wealth necessary to purchase land through bribery and corruption. They could also manipulate the system to bring to sale land that they specifically wanted.



Therefore, the Indian farmer who till then produced enough to feed the country and his family, since land was religion and not a commodity, started looking towards avenues other than agriculture. Even the zamindars who had been attached with their lands, started their drift towards other sources of income.



In short, the agricultural land had now become a commodity.



The seed of the Indian slum had been laid.



Slowly but steadily the East India Company spread its tentacles all over the country. Farmers in Bengal were forced to sow Indigo, which although commercially viable for the British industry had no value for the Indian farmer. Untold misery was unleashed on the poor farmer, who was made to work under bondage and forced labour. The cultivation of Indigo ensured that the land was now unfit for any other cultivation.



The farmer who was the backbone of the Indian economy was now under enormous debt. People were looking towards the cities, since at least there could work as menial labors as there was nobody who could recognize them. The question of status and family pride could not be ignored in a status conscious socierty as India.



The coming of industrialization ensured that India from a producer economy, got converted into a supplier economy. Indian cotton fabric, which was renowned for its texture and handwork was surpassed by British machine made goods, which were mass produced and therefore extremely cheap. The British further did not provide a level playing field as unjust duties were introduced on Indian textile articles entering Britain while the British machine made goods were exempted from any duty in India.

The term 'unfair trade practices' was unknown in those days.

The sun was setting for the Indian cotton Industry.

The slums were filling up.



Danny Boyle gets lots of slum shots at this stage. Lots of poor, undernourished children and malnutrition parents.



The Indian economy was reducing the slums in London, and the slums in Mumbai …….well!!!



Dadabhai Naoroji, the great freedom fighter who made the first economic treastise on this drain of Indian money, summed it up presciently, “the English were like the sponge who sucked up the Ganges and let it off on the Thames.”


Wonder whether Danny Boyle knows about Dadabhai Naoroji? But anyway, since this not a documentary, why bother!


Then came the two World wars.



India which never had an option was dragged into a war which was fought far away from its lands and being fought for Imperial purposes. But subservient people don’t have a voice do they?



Men and material were drained away for the purpose of fighting this war. Good that nobody has made a study on the material drain in these two wars, otherwise we might have to traverse the path of documentary.



Kashmir was left as a last act of vengeance by the deceit (or intelligence, depends on your choice, movie or documentary) of the British. An act which keeps two neighbours at the throat of each other and diverts resources which could have stopped further slums from prospering.



Finally the story comes to its climax.



The interplay of greedy politicians, indifferent citizens, insensitive bureaucracy, ensures in the climax of the report of the United Nations World Food Programme in 2009, which states that 230 million people in India are undernourished, malnutrition accounts for nearly 50% of child deaths in India.



The report places India at the 94th place in the Global Hunger Index amongst 119 countries. It further informs that 43% of children (under 5 years) in the country are underweight. The figure is much higher than the global average of 25% and even higher than the sub-Saharan figure of 28%. More than 70% of the children (under 5 years) suffer from anemia.



Imagine the close up shots of under nourished children, their face emaciated, eyes sunk in holes and the standing ovations at the Kodak theatre and the number of Oscars.



The best part for this movie will obviously be the acclaim it receives from the media and the movie stars who starve for six months to get a ‘zero figure’. Unlucky people, these stars I tell you. Imagine starving for six months to get a 'zero figure' whereas a vast majority attains it as a matter of routine(facts above, in case of disbelief)


Slum dog India sells, and sells hot.



And no, we will not tell anybody that Danny Boyle is as British as the East India Company or Robert Clive, since this is not the story of a documentary film where you discuss the origin of a problem, but the story of a commercial film where you simply sell what is being demanded by the audience. Here the story of a sex worker is sold as a voyeuristic thriller.



JAI HO


Saturday, February 14, 2009

JAI HO

Congratulations to A.R.Rahman for being nominated to the Oscars after winning numerous international awards for his song JAI HO, from the movie Slum dog Millionaire. That Rahman has innumerable previous songs which are far superior in comparison but did not receive international recognition is besides the point.


JAI HO, Pramod Muthalik and his brave Sri Ram Sene who with their act of chivalry in Mangalore have brought glory to the nation and its culture. This epitomizes everything they claim to represent. They have atleast exposed the farce of women getting respect in this country, where thousands of women face lewd remarks and gestures, sexual harassment, once they leave their home or even at their home. Muthalik’s claim to forcibly marry off couples caught together on the Valentine’s day has ensured that the 14th of February has surpassed the Republic day and the Independence day in terms of preventive security measures. Atleast we can expect to remain safe from terrorist attacks , bomb explosions and stuff on that day, with unprecedented security measures in place. This bunch of goons has also exposed the farce which goes on in the name of governance in this country. Remember MNS and Raj Thackrey! If our government cannot tackle these louts, how do we expect them to save us? JAI HO…….


JAI HO, to the Pink Chaddi campaign, which has been started by some netizens, as they call themselves, to oppose the Sri Ram Sene and its plans to disrupt the great Valentine’s day celebrations. The campaign which apparently is drawing huge response from the netizens, especially the females(how do you know? Well beats me!) calls for the females (or males) to buy pink chaddis at dirt cheap prices and send them to the Sri Ram Sene office and flood the pubs on the Valentine’s day. The idea ostensibly is to spread love. My sources tell me that what of Sri Ram Sene louts, all the great love seeking louts (also known as eve teasers) in the country are out on the streets today, asking the school-college going girls and the office going women or even the women buying vegetables, for the pink….you know what! Great idea netizens, this chaddi bit, especially as it is done from the safety and anonymity of the internet. Let those who go out, face the music. This will definitely go a long way in the emancipation of women in this country. And please do not bother about female foeticide, bride burning, child marriage, high female dropout level in the schools, rapes, harassment at the workplace. Let us ask this harassed lot to spread the pink chaddi campaign whenever some criminal assaults them or take him to a pub and voila the problems will vanish. What an Idea Sirji! as an ad line goes. JAI HO…….


JAI HO, the card companies and some music companies who along with people like Muthalik and the Pink chaddi campaigners have ensured that a non descript event like the Valentine’s day has become a day surpassing the Independence day or the birthday of Mahatma Gandhi in importance. Business like politics, makes for strange partners. At times it appears that we Indians were bereft of love before the arrival of St. Valentine’s day, looking at the manner it is promoted. That the divorce rates have been rising dramatically with the advent of such festivals of love is a trivial for which no social scientist need bother. JAI HO……..


JAI HO, Renuka Chowdhury, the minister for Women and Child development for nearly getting the Karnataka govt. dismissed after the Mangalore incident. That the state govt. belonged to an opposition party is … well… besides the point. What of the fact that only a couple of months ago two girls were burnt in an acid attack in Gulbarga in her home state of Andhra Pradesh, by a jilted lover. One of them later passed away. But then A.P is ruled by her party. So the mute button on madam minister. We cannot blame her for politicizing such issues as they are taking place all over the country without any punishment being meted out to the culprits. Her agenda is to pressurise the opposition govts. and not to improve the safety of the women. That is the job of the Home Minister, you see! And no suggestions asking her to concentrate on any programme to ensure that female dropouts in school are brought down, female child is not killed in the womb itself. Well she is a minister and does not have the time for such unglamourous stuff! No publicity, you see!! JAI HO……..


JAI HO, the women ‘activists’ in the country for the manner in which they take up female issues in the country and talk of the moral brigade (especially the saffron kind), but never ….never talk about Asiya Andrabi and her organization the Dukhtaran-e-Millat (Daughters of the nation) in Jammu and Kashmir, which calls for implementation of strict sharia laws, compulsory wearing of the veil(burqa), support polygamy, prohibit women from visiting beauty parlours because God has created everybody as he wanted them to be, throw acids on anybody defying their edicts. Sample one of Andrabi’s famous assertions- “I would be more than glad to share my house with other wives of Qasim (her husband)”.


Andrabi is even more categorical on national issues, sample another one of her sayings, “I don't believe in Kashmiriyat, I don't believe in nationalism. I believe there are two nations - Muslims and non-Muslims.”


A.K. Hangal summed it up nicely in the movie Sholay, “Yeh itna sannata kyon hai bhai” (Why this silence?) But then Hangal did not know Andrabi, did he? The women activists press their mute button whenever somebody mentions Andrabi, but then getting burnt by acid is also extremely painful. JAI HO……...


JAI HO, Police Commissioner of Hyderabad, who even after Ramalinga Raju of Satyam infamy, owned up to the massive fraud to the tune of Rs.7000/- crores, at a press conference, refused to move in and arrest him for three days after the admission of guilt, ostensibly because “nobody had lodged a complaint against him.” That a few days after his arrest, the public prosecutor prayed before the court to extend Raju’s custody becausehe was making vital documents disappear even after his arrest, and therefore it would be detrimental to let him out on the bail”, tells the whole story. JAI HO………..


JAI HO, to the rulers of the day for ensuring that Navin Chawla will become the next election commissioner of the country after the superannuation of N.Gopalaswami. Whatever the technical merits or otherwise of the recommendation of the CEC, N.Gopalaswami under section 324 (5) of the Constitution and the legal interpretation of the word ‘Recommendation’ in the said section of the constitution, qudos should go to the law minister H.R.Bharadwaj for calling the present CEC ‘petty’ and further letting the cat out of the bag by stating that Gopalaswami had ‘spoilt his retirement’. This my friend remains the eternal truth, that a bureaucrat if per chance raises his voice against the system ‘spoils his retirement’ meaning thereby he cannot become a Rajya Sabha M.P, an ambassador or even a governor after his retirement. Look at M.S.Gill the ex CEC who did not spoil his retirement and has been blessed by being appointed the sports minister in the present disposition.


Please also sample the fact that no effort has been made to obtain a presidential reference on the constitutional legality of the recommendation of the CEC from the Supreme Court. The presidential reference is one of the powers of the president by which an opinion can be obtained from the Supreme Court in case of an issue of constitutional propriety.


Let us also doff our caps at the track record of the person who will be our next CEC and thereby conduct the next general election---


Navin Chawla was secretary to the Lieutenant Governor of Delhi during the period of emergency (1975-77), and famously remarked, “Let them roast under the asbestos sheets”, when the Supdt. of the Tihar jail objected to the overcrowding of the Tihar jail with political prisoners against all norms of jails. The Shah Commission, which inquired into the excesses during the Emergency, indicted Mr Chawla for having been 'authoritarian and callous' and for gross misuse of power "in cynical disregard of the welfare of citizens". Further, it declared that he was "unfit to hold any public office which demands an attitude of fair play and consideration for others".

The story does not end at this, the Election Commissioner and his wife Rupika ran the Jaipur-based Lala Chaman Lal Education Trust which had secured MPLADS funds from Congress MPs — A.A. Khan, R.P. Goenka, Ambika Soni, Dr Karan Singh and Mr A.R. Kidwai. He accepted funds for private trusts. The trust was allotted six acres of land by the Congress government in Rajasthan when Mr Ashok Gehlot was the Chief Minister in his previous terms. Need we say more, except that Indian democracy is in safe and impartial hands, JAI HO……….


JAI HO, to our law enforcing agencies, for the manner in which they permit lumpen elements like Pramod Muthalik, Raj Thackrey and their ilk run amok and for the manner in which they harass the innocent, defenceless people under any pretext, while at the same time acting servile before the criminals. When they cannot stop Muthalik how do we expect them to face Ajmal Aamir Kasab? But the inside story is that they want the common people to be self sufficient and defend themselves rather than look in askance towards others. JAI HO……..


JAI HO, to Danny Boyle and the Slum dog Millionaire for showing that Indian poverty sells massively in the West and that we Indians go ga ga over anything accepted by the firangs. Not one western movie maker encapsulates anything which is positive in India. For them we remain the land of snake charmers and the magical fakirs, and we remain too happy to oblige. It is fascinating to watch these movie makers rake in billions by selling our poverty and penury. After all, apparently, there are no homeless and naked in New York or London, no beggars, no criminals. Maybe Anil Kapoor will make a fictional movie on the poverty and crime in the ghettos of New York, after he stops counting his billions and the grin on his face while marketing all that is naked about India, subsides. JAI HO……….


And last but not the least, JAI HO, to the common people in this nation, who remain indifferent to our rivers being polluted, our water bodies disappearing by the magicians also known as the real estate developers, our forest vanishing, the corruption which like a demon has engulfed all facets of our lives, the religious fundamentalism, the neglect of primary education, healthcare and the connivance of our leaders and the bureaucrats in making this happen. But the news channels talk of the threat from outside, don’t they???? And we switch off our TV sets and go off to sleep completely oblivious to everything around us, completely immune to the misery, the pain, the lawlessness,the exploitation. JAI HO…………


JAI HO…………