RAJ KA SWARAJ

OPEN LETTER TO RAJ THACKREY
Respected Shri Raj Thackrey ,
Salutations.
I write this letter to show my regards towards your effort towards the nation of Maharashtra in general and The city of Mumbai in particular.
While watching a news report on an English channel yesterday ( I know your antipathy towards these English and Hindi news channels, but I also believe in the dictum "keep your friends close ,but your enemies closer still". Hope your followers understand). Anyway while watching the news report , I saw an Advertisement hoarding proudly proclaim " MANSE spray lagao ,Bhaiya macchar door bhagao " (MANSE as in Maharashtra Nav Nirman Sena) . What ingenuity ! Why did somebody not think of it before ? Prasoon Pandey , move over!!
I will reveal a dark secret about myself , hope you do not discard my letter after learning about my ethnicity . Sir , I am a big fan of yours , so I hope you forgive me for this dark chapter of my life. The secret is that I am a Bhaiya ( O God , please let the earth open and swallow me , O the shame is unbearable ) .
I believe that being a Bhaiya is the curse placed upon me for the Wrongs of my earlier life , but what to do now . After appreciating the great Ad placed by your party in my mind ( you see my family and friends also belong to the same clan , and I have to bear with them ) , I started shifting channels ( you see , I am a useless man, and have so much of time to waste over petty things ...............No ! No! sir , please do not misunderstand ....)
So I came across a movie channel showing a movie SHAHEED (Darned hindi movie. Wonder why your Bhabhi produces Hindi movies . Good that you have left them ). The sequence was wherein the Revolutionaries like Bhagat Singh , Chandra Shekhar Azad , Rajguru were singing a song , which went like--"......Koi Punjab se , Koi Maharashtra se , Koi U.P se hai , Koi Bengal se. Teri Pooja ki Thali Mein laye Hain Hum , Phool Har Rang Ke , Phool Har daal ke ..... Aye Watan , Aye Watan."
Since my Marathi is very poor ( I learn Marathi from your enlightening posters , but the only words I have picked up are Maaro , Bhagao ,Kaato ,but I hope to learn more such words soon ) , I would again seek your forgiveness , and make a rough English translation (being a Bhaiya my English too is very poor ) . The song talks of national integration and obesiance to Mother India. National integration , is it ? Served those guys right....Get real guys! But what made my blood seeth with anger was the equating of Maharashtra with the rest of the states , especially U.P. How dare they ? Now you know why these guys failed !
I was on the verge of breaking the T.V set but since I had bought home a D.V.D of a Marathi movie of Dada Kondke , wiser counsel prevailed . Sir, not for a moment do I believe my friends when they say that Dada's movies are full of double meaning dialogues only , in the similar way as I do not believe that your Benevolent self (salutations again) is faking this Hungama to save your finished political carrier and develop a vote bank to have a bargaining chip after the upcoming Assembly elections . This is the problem with these Bhaiyas , always casting aspersions on the benevolence of others. Always talking of Politics only .
Speaking of movies , I wish you really throw this man, Amitabh Bachchan out of Mumbai. Imagine a Bhaiya ruling over the Film Industry. How shameful can life be? They call him the most recognised man in India , the face of Indian films , Unique national integration in his home ( Father-A poet, Mother - Punjabi , Wife- Bengali , Son-in -law- Punjabi, Daughter-in law- Southie) . Arre baba what is this , a family or a Khichdi. No purety in the family, I tell you . What will the Marathi Manoos learn from them , you tell me ......... I really do not know why your Uncle invited him to unveil your nephew's debut album . Good that you have left him.
Why only the Bachchan's ,throw out the Kapoor's , The Chopra's , The Johar's, The Bhansali's , The Khan's (except Salman, he like me, supports you ) and the rest of the lot. Spoiling the whole place with their fantasies. The treatment they give to Marathi actors is disgusting . I still remember Sachin's role in SHOLAY , imagine such a long movie and Sachin plays a dead body for a few seconds. But we all must appreciate that he infused life into the character. Well if your Uncle was as energetic as you we would have been saved the ignominy of listening to Kishore , Mukesh, R.D Burman ,his father S.D and watching movies of Guru Dutt , Dilip Kumar, Dev Anand ,Hrishikesh Mukherjee . Spoil the entire culture, these guys did, but why cry over spilt milk.
Actually , this ethnicity should have been imposed even earlier , but what to do, Chattrapati Shivaji with his call for Hindvi Swaraj( Indian and not Hindu Swaraj) , Bal Gangadhar Tilak with his quest for freedom from the British , Baba Saheb Ambedkar with his desire for the uplift of the socially oppressed, did not have your Intellect, neither your Wisdom ,nor Vision( I will hit anybody who says 'political opportunism' ).
Going back to your vision of Maha for Marathi (somebody informs me that Hitler too wanted a Germany for Germans , but I do not listen to these History guys anyway. They only talk of learning from History to avoid the same mistakes in future. But I am sure even you do not study History, so what mistake , what learning. Ignorance is bliss , they say.) , let us first throw out the Gujratis , led by that family ,The Ambanis. Imagine a petrol pump attendant, earning so much money and making a 28 storey house (biggest in the World they tellme) . What if they provide employment to so many people and stuff . They do not belong and out they go.
These bhaiyas have even infiltrated the Police force . The top encounter specialist Pradeep Sharma is a Bhaiya and even his sidekick Daya Naik was a Southie . They have made sure that the Mumabai ATS (Anti Terrorist Squad ) chief , is a bhaiya. Making Mumbai a violent place ,Aren't they? Send them back.
I am glad that you have received tremendous support for your policies from the Marathi Manoos . Look at Sachin Tendulkar , Lata Mangeshkar, not a word in protest!! There is a saying in Sanskrit that staying silent , means tacit acceptance . I believe that the great Nana Patekar has come out in open support for you , just please tell him to stop acting in Hindi Films , as my friends make fun of me for this hypocricy ( they say so , not me). And please do send some your Goons......ooops.... followers to thrash Sachin for naming his team the MUMBAI INDIANS and not MUMBAI MARATHAS. Has he gone insane or what?
And Sir, not for a moment do I believe my Bhaiya friends when they compare your divine policies with ethnic cleansing in Kashmir, after all that was the handiwork of the I.S.I (your uncle used to say so ) and you Sir , are no...............
Regards and salutations
JAI RAJRASHTRA , MOVE OVER BHARAT RASHTRA.

TERI POOJA KI THALI MEIN LAYEIN HAIN HUM , PHOOLHAR RANG KE PHOOL HAR DAAL KE......... AYE WATN , AYE WATAN............