MANORANJAN KA BAAP III- THE FINALE

“ He is the Moses of the game who has shown the path to blazing success.”-----Ravi Shastri speaking about Lalit Modi .
On my daily visit to the temple , this morning , I was surprised to find a voice conversing with somebody inside the temple . Peeping inside to enquire about the identity of the person , since there are very few people in the temple at dawn , my surprise turned to shock when I saw Moses , oops , Lalit Modi conversing with God .
The conversation went somewhat like this :
Lalit Modi to God: “ Khush to bahoot hoge aaj . Main ha main, jisne aaj tak kisi se kuch nahi maanga , aaj tumhare samne khada hoon . Woh kal ka baccha Stanford , jise koi nahi jaanta tha West Indies ke bahar , aaj Manoranjan ka dada (Grandfather) ho gaya . Main Manoranjan ka baap is nowhere . Khush to bahoot hoge aaj ………
Not knowing how to make head and tail of the conversation , I followed Lalit Modi outside the temple , and asked him “ Commissioner sahib ( I call him that only , I think he feels good about it ) , is everything alright ?”
Modi looked at me in disgust and said “ Don’t you know what Stanford has done ?”
Since I have failed to qualify for Paanchvi Pass , you can imagine my I.Q and General Awareness , but I did not want to appear my true self before Moses , I bluffed , “ Yes indeed , what a pity!!”
Believing that Stanford university had invented something or laid claim for patent on the cheerleaders , which had infuriated Lalit Modi , I went back and surfed the net for the latest on Stanford .
Very soon this ‘Paanchvi fail’ realized that Sir Allen Stanford , who is the chairman of Stanford financial group , is also into wealth management , real estate , insurance and it appears every money making machine under the Sun , had lauched a 20/20 tournament between The English XI and a Super Star XI . The Super Star XI will be composed of players from the Carribean and believe it or not , The Winner gets 10 million pounds in prize money . This Stanford fellow landed in a helicopter on the hallowed turf of Lord’s and brought along the entire prize money in a chest , as if to assure everybody that he was not bluffing . The players composing the winning XI will get 1 million pounds individually , one million pounds will be distributed among the players on the bench, the support staff will get one million pounds and the remaining 7 million pounds will be distributed between the English and the West Indian Cricket boards . Furthermore , the losing side will not get anything …….. yes ,NOTHING !!
Then it hit me …..
The Americans , as I had feared for long are out to get India . Like the spurned lover , they are out to get us because we have not acceded to the Nuclear Deal . First that President of theirs , that small Bush says that the food crisis in the world is because of us Indians ( Arre baba , we toh only eat McDonalds Burgers , and the poor still die of starvation ) , the Energy crisis is also because of us Indians. They have even issued advisories to their tourists to avoid Mumbai during monsoon , lest they fall into open manholes .

Cowards of the first order , I tell you , scared of falling into manholes , when we have been doing it for ages , nonchalantly . Kids in our country fall into borewells and become richer once they come out , and these Americans ……they want to catch bin Laden ……. Now when Moses Modi innovates something and employs American cheerleaders to entertain our cricket lovers ( I call it the revenge of the Indians , Americans dancing to our tunes , rather than the other way round) , here comes the Stanford fellow , and spoils everything .
These Americans , they have no respect or love for cricket , but like true Imperialists , they want to buy everything . Cricket , I tell you is a game of Gentleman ( what if Harbhajan slaps Sreesanth) and tradition (in which game else do you find so much time to sledge! ) and people play it for honour rather than money (IPL notwithstanding) .
Arre Baba , I tell you , what are Americans ……got no culture , no respect for women , no respect for elders …….bus money , money , money . Look at us and our traditions .
And no sir , I will not discuss the contemporary Indian tradition of ‘Honour killings’, ‘Female foeticide’, ‘the fact that the Govt .has to introduce law to enforce care for elderly parents’.
Anyway , let’s get back to Cricket . Cricket ! What Cricket ? I thought we were discussing 20/20 .
Oops….I forgot 20/20 also pertains to cricket , although with the IPL jamboree alongwith cheerleaders , players fighting with each other, Preity (pun intended ) heroines , Liquor bottles in pavilions , we simply forgot .
Speaking of liquor bottles , I take this opportunity to bow down in reverence to Ness Wadia , the scion of Bombay Dyeing ( how appropriate , with Raj T. around) and incidentally the owner of the Punjab King’s XI , who called the SSP (Senior Supdt. Of Police ) of Mohali , “ A small and a mean Man”.
Apparently the Punjab Police personnel were stealing T shirts and liquor bottles from the pavilion and Wadia and the SSP got into an argument . The same Punjab Police was once headed by one K.P.S . Gill and wiped out the terrorists from the state without any questions being raised . How the mighty have fallen !!!! Bravo , Bravo, Mr. Wadia …..what is an SSP anyway in front of you ? One who has merely qualified the exam considered to be amongst the toughest in the world (Civil Services) , earns in a month ( at least the salary) what you earn in probably in an hour , surely does not have a girlfriend as Preity ( pun again intended) as yours , and is merely a symbol of the Sarkar ( not Amitabh) . I am sure you keep the Sarkar and its Sarkar Raj , in your pocket . You , the one who is a great grandson of the Great Mohd. Ali Jinnah , the one who has the blood of a nation builder ( or destroyer , depending on how you look at it) , in his veins and a mere ‘ small and mean policewalah , dares to argue with you . I would have wished to be around if you had said the same thing to that man KPS Gill . Boy … it would have been fun .
But , since I am also a small and mean man , and am also a bit thick in the head , I just seek a clarification from Mr. Wadia , if his royal highness does not feel offended . Benevolent Sir , could you please let me know the reasons behind Liquor Bottles in the Pavilion ???

Maybe it is the tradition of Cricket ………..On second thought , maybe this was the reason for Bhajji slapping Sree . The bugger , belongs to Kerala is playing for Punjab and having fun , and here he was , a thoroughbred Punjabi stuck with this stingy Marathi Manoos . His owner Mukesh Ambani needed all the money for the dream home he is building and his captain Sachin has recently brought a mansion for 39 crores only , which he will be Demolishing , to build a new home . Expecting both of them to spare anything for Bhajji , was like expecting an Eskimo to buy a refrigerator .
Speaking of Sachin , the poor guy is exhausted of playing 3-4 matches in IPL and is not playing for the country at the ongoing tournament in Bangladesh .
Arre Baba , Bacche ki jaan loge kya ? What if he did not play in the test matches against South Africa , before IPL . He was unfit , yaar . He played 3,4 matches in IPL and has subsequently become ‘ unfit’ . What if he looked completely fit while playing in IPL ? I will not respond your snide remarks about him selecting to play in matches he wishes to .
You nasty people , Sachin has just brought a 39 crore mansion , Inflation is touching 8.7% , Petroleum prices have been hiked and all you want is , Sachin to Play!! Does he not have a family to look after , Merc and numerous other fuel guzzlers which require fuel ………….If he starts playing , who will do all the Ad shoots , Baba !!! As it is , this Dhoni guy is creating problems . No , Not with the team yaar , there he is no comparison , but in the modelling assignments . Wonder where he gets all the time to shoot , doesn’t he have to practice to play cricket !!
I must tell you about the fate of this guy , Rahul Dravid , who used to practice cricket all the time , used to think of cricket all the time . I heard somewhere that his dining table was designed like a cricket pitch , so that he could focus on cricket all the time. He restricted his practice of Ad shoots , talked of commitment , sincerity , integrity , read up on famous books , biographies .
Result ::::His skewed priorities ensured that The great Vijay Mallya ( one of my favourites) is teaching him the technique to build a team , In Public!!! The selectors have thrown him out of the limited overs team and I am sure , he will lose his spot in the test squad also, very soon. . Serves the guy right! Who asked him to be goody-goody , sincere , become the wicket keeper so that the team got the balance right , who asked him to open the innings when everybody , including the great one , ran away . Who asked this Rahul fellow to stand up against hostile fast bowlers when the smart ones simply surrendered and walked away for the Ad shoot . I give a damn (apparently even the selectors do ) to his statistics in matches away from home , in matches India had won ……..God has a way of ensuring that these guys get their desserts .

Desserts ………. Yes , the Stanford fellow ( I think he belongs to CIA) will get his desserts . He and his agency are no match for the ingenuity of our brilliant commissioner Lalit Modi . Modi has now introduced the concept of ‘Bartering’ in the IPL . Yessss, sir , ‘bartering’ , you know , like in olden times when you did not need money to procure something . You simply exchanged items . Confused!!
Let me illustrate , for example , if Kolkata want Gibbs from Hyderabad (not for match fixing , you fools..) , they can offer any other player from their team, ( obviously not the best , that they keep for themselves) , say the guy from Mizoram , who never played a match . If Hyderabad accept ( wonder why ) , the exchange is made , without money being involved.
What brilliance ! In these times of inflation and stuff , one of the theories being floated for the high rate of inflation , is the excess money in circulation in the market ( Don’t ask me ,I have not seen it ) . So with the barter in place we kill three birds with one stone . You get the player you want , dispose the one you dislike and most importantly , curtail inflation . Not for nothing are the Marwaris known for their business acumen .
What say , Sir Stanford , when you guys are scared of falling into manholes , how do you tackle this genius . You CIA guys , better stick to catching Laden , that might be easier .
Reportedly , Vijay Mallya has jumped on to the bartering idea . He wants to exchange Rahul Dravid . The worst part is that he does not want any player in exchange !! Shahrukh has also warmed upto the idea , but the Paanchvi Fail he also is, he wants to exchange any of his players for Preity Zinta , since he wants all the star power in his team . The fool , does not know that the scheme is for players only . Fools you are , with Shahrukh anything is possible . Ever heard a ban on a player being lifted for a month so that he can play for a team , the ban gets imposed when the tournament is over . Happened with Shoaib , didn’t it ? Banned for five or was it two years , his ban was kept in abeyance for one month , so that he could play for Shahrukh’s team . My sources tell me that even Ben Johnson has approached Shahrukh to get his life ban for steroid use, uplifted .

Anyway , the IPL is over , Dravid is practicing his footwork against spinners , Sachin is shooting for Ads and speaking to interior decorators , Shoaib is back to being banned , Preity is back for her shootings (Thank God) , Bhajji is brushing up on his vocabulary (speaking Monkey in Swahiili) and last but not the least Ekta Kapoor is back .

A COMRADE'S DIARY

This morning , while visiting the flea market , I managed to get my hands on the diary of a comrade . Though it is unethical to read a personal diary , I thought that I would share the contents of the diary in this writeup . I must inform all you useless people that the diary is reproduced ad-verbatim , and since Comrades are found mostly in West Bengal , I have only translated the parts written in Bengali . Therefore , I bear no responsibility towards the contents . Any grievance or appreciation be directed towards our dear comrade .
The relevant excerpts are reproduced hereunder :

JUNE 5 , 2008:
The bandh called to protest against the price hike in the petroleum products has been successful . This time our senior comrades have gone further and called bandh for a week , alongwith a call for its forcible implementation . Arre baba , we are such loving and caring people that people support our movements spontaneously , Na Korle Jabe Kothay , Pa Gulo Bhengey Debo ( we will break their legs if they don't) . We have developed the imposition of bandh into an art . Anybody trying to venture out on a bandh day , is taught the ART OF DYING . How dare they defy our call for protecting the interests of the poor . I still cannot stop myself from laughing when I remember the bandh called by our sister organisation CITU , a few years back . We caught hold of a few people while they were about to enter the international airport , to board a flight . There were a few women and children also , Ar Oder Chool Dhore Ja Tanlam ( dragged them by their hair ) . The way they were begging before us for forgiveness . Serves them right , doesn't it , for abandoning the poor and running away . The next day my photograph appeared in the newspapers , dragging a lady by her hair . I have gotten the photograph framed and it is hung inside my house . I was made the Gen. Secy. Of my local area committee after this brave incident . Somebody tell the senior comrades that why forcible implementation , when we can do so by love and affection only .
The media people keep on harping that the poor suffer the maximum during the bandhs as they cannot venture outside and earn a living . The media is full of middle class people , I tell you ! History is witness to the fact that revolutions are built on the dead bodies of the poor only . Look at the Russian Revolution . Did not hundreds and thousands of poor die during the revolution . But the result was there for all to see . Did our appartchiks not become the noveau rich , after all the blood had flown from the poor . This is the problem with the Indian poor , only thinking about the next meal .
That Bantoo Ghosh was saying that why doesn't the communist party withdraw support from the govt. for its anti-people policies and why does it fight with the Congress in West Bengal and Kerala and support them at the centre . He went on to say that there must be some magic in the P.M's tea since our comrades get pacified after meeting the P.M over a cup of tea . These anti revolutionaries are such a pain in the back . The Bantoo fellow will always drive a rickshaw in his life, I tell you . What does he know of politics anyway , he is not affected by rise in petroleum prices since he pulls a rickshaw , does not require petrol/ diesel , hardly earns anything , so does not need L.P.G. to cook food. He is saying that other goods like edibles will also get costly . FOOD……FOOD…. is that all they think about !! Here I am sitting in the latest Mc Donald's joint in Kolkata , thinking about revolution and the poor , without any care for inflation and stuff . Saala , Kaar Sahos Je Aamake Bill Debe ( who will dare to bill me ) . Unless and until the poor stop thinking of Food , their fate will not improve . There is so much in life to think about , people's revolution , egalitarian society , fighting the communal forces , and all they care about is FOOD!!!
Somebody told me that the actual cost of petrol is Rs. 22 only and the rest are taxes , and why doesn't the Govt. rationalise the taxes . Eder Ki Bolbo ( What do I tell them ) , this middle class does not want to pay taxes . Arre , if you do not pay taxes , how will our leaders go abroad ( to Cuba , ofcourse ) , how will we arrange a public reception for Hugo Chavez ( President of Venezuela ) . You people do not know that Venezuela is the IInd highest supplier of petroleum products to U.S.A . So you see, they can kill the great satan anyday they wish to .
Just hang on for a second , dear diary , let me attend to the call my son has made from U.S.A ., he is Green Card holder , you see . No , No , he did not study in Cuba or Venezuela , but studied in Iowa University .
Bantoo ( the Rickshawallah ) was telling me that why doesn't Chavez supply us petrol at a cheap rate , if he is such a good friend .
I told you na , these poor people , they do not understand market economics . Arre , why should he sell it to us at a cheap rate , if he can sell it at twice the rate to the great satan . Is a comrade not entitled to think of profit?
Talking of market economics , who better than our beloved Buddha babu to help us understand the concept . Have you seen the remarkable transition he has made to our policies , remember the one about a stateless and classless society and abolition of private property. After all we were the first to implement land reforms in the country , post Independence . The land was distributed amongst the poor , but the poor, the way they are, started resisting when we wanted the land back in Nandigram . After all , they say , they need the land for agricultural purposes and have refused to hand the land back to us for the purpose of SEZ . We again come back to the same logic of FOOD . Arre baba , how much food will you grow and consume . If you let us build SEZ , we will employ one person from each family in the factories . The employment will help you in buying food from the open market and you will also be empowered to buy Motorcycles , TV, Pepsi and stuff . Here we are on the verge of giving you so much and you insist on land . We have even ensured that the wonder car NANO is being built in West Bengal , at Singur . Taught the farmers in Singur a lesson they will not forget in a hurry . Now they are selling their land and will buy NANO with the money they get in compensation . But you Nandigram people are so selfish , Tomader Sudhu Zami Chayi ( you only want land).
These Nandigram people are so lucky that State Govt. is not permitted to have tanks , otherwise we would have shown them , the way our Chinese dadas did at Tianammen . Ungrateful wretches .
Dear diary , I must cofide in you . I have been given the charge of mobilising 500 cadres to go to Maharashtra to oppose the SEZ they are building there . Ki Bhabe , Ora Gorib Manoosher Zamin Nite Paare ( Do they think that they can take over the land of the poor people ).
I have just heard the news that the Trinamool Congress has called for a bandh tomorrow , to protest against the fuel price hike . These bourgeois think that they can get away with anything . Gorib Manoosh Kaaj Na Korle Khaabe Ki ( What will the poor man eat , if he is not allowed to work on a bandh day!). They have no consideration for the losses suffered throughout the state due to a bandh day . We will oppose the bandh with all our might . Dekhi Ke Dokan Ar Office Bandh Korate Paare ( we will see who can get the shops and offices closed ) .
KORBE LORBE JEETBO RE ( WILL DO , WILL FIGHT , WILL WIN)
POOR OF THE WORLD UNITE .

MAY 10, 2008
This governor Gopal Krishna Gandhi , who does he think he is ?
Mahatma Gandhier naati hole ki ? ( What that he is Mahatma Gandhi's grandson). He has decided that he will switch off the electricity at the Raj Bhawan for and hour every evening , to show solidarity with the common people in the city who are facing unscheduled power cuts . This business of empathising is ours, , how dare he usurp our role ? Our General Secy . Shyamal Chakravorti has put him in place , by saying that the Governor should eat once in a day , to empathise with the hungry , walk to programmes to save petrol etc. Daroon Boleche (brilliantly said) , HA HA .......
Arre this man is lucky . He should have consulted Dharamvir , the Governor in the late 1960' s , who was spat upon by our MLA's in the assembly . If Gandhi was posted as Governor in U.P. , he would never have tried to show his feelings by switching of electricity . Mayawati would have ensured that the lights never came back to his residence .
From the day he has come in , he is trying to teach us Gandhigiri . Imagine empathising with Taslima Nasrin, expressing sympathy with the people in Nandigram , calling for a debate on SEZ . Arre baba , what is there to debate !!! SEZ will be supported in West Bengal and Kerala , and opposed elsewhere . SIMPLE.... We have to protect the poor and oppressed elsewhere , whereas we already protect them in these two states . We have protected them like a specie on the verge of extinction . They have not been allowed to improve their standard of life , one wee bit .

This Gandhi fellow is quite like his Dadu (grandfather) . Prolific writer , has even reduced his security detail to a couple of cars . I cannot imagine anybody with only a couple of cars for security . Jyoti babu had 10 cars in his fleet and even Buddha babu , who started with two cars , is now protected by a large security detail . Threat from our ideological cousins , the Maoists , you see.
These Maoist fellows also claim to be fighting for the poor . I am completely confused ! How many people will fight for the poor and then fight amongst themselves , claiming to be the true representative of the poor . The poor remain poor but their representatives keep getting richer . This is the fun of poverty in our country .

MARCH 5, 2008.

Today , that badmash (rogue) Taslima Nasrin , has finally left the country . Baba , what a pain she had become . Our senior comrades gave shelter to her in Kolkata because we are so liberal and respect women .

But we have to look after our vote bank also . For years we have let in our brethrens from Bangladesh , unfettered into the country , provided them Ration cards , Voter I cards , everything a genuine citizen requires . So much so , the demography has completely changed in places bordering Bangladesh . But at least these people vote for us .

And this lady keeps on harping on women's rights in Islam and similar stuff .

Our Bangladeshi friends despise her and resorted to violence last year .

Dekho Kotha Bola Aalada ( Look it is a different thing to speak ) , but we cannot lose our assiduously built vote bank . We ensured that our firebrands Brinda Karat , Arundhati Roy , Shabana Azmi , did not utter a word in her favour and we subsequently forced her out of the city by simply refusing to protect the lady . What could she do , apart from runing away . Since she was not willing to stay anywhere else in India , apart from Kolkata , and we refused to let her in , what option did she have ?

It is our duty to absorb and protect millions of immigrants , but why should we bother about a lady . It is a democracy after all ::One against a million .

Tommorow Shabana Azmi is coming to the city , to participate in the seminar on Justice for women in Nigeria . I will be going there , after all women are our mothers and sisters .

I am going to sleep , dear diary.

LAL SALAAM.

THE END

UNDER CAPITALISM , MAN EXPLOITS MAN . UNDER COMMUNISM IT IS JUST THE OPPOSITE -----JOHN KENNETH GALBRAITH

RETURN OF RESERVATION

This morning , a 10 year old boy from my neighbourhood , walked into my house , and said , “ Uncle , I want to write a letter to the Railway Minister Laloo Prasad Yadav , will you please help me out .” I wondered whether this kid had seen today’s news report about the theft of a Padma Vibhushan medallion from the President’s Personal Assistant , who was going to deliver it to an ill recipient . The incident happened inside the Farraka Express . Maybe the kid wanted to write about the great shame and request the minister to improve safety inside the trains.
Or maybe he had seen Laloo perform along with other kids in a reality show and had become a fan of his , as indeed the Americans have , where these famous institutes keep inviting him to deliver lectures .
Intrigued , I asked him about the contents he wanted to communicate.The kid answered , “ I saw a photograph in the news papers a couple of days back , where some people in turbans and women invisible in their ghoonghats were removing Railway tracks .”
I enquired whether he knew the reason behind this act .The kid replied , “ Yes , because they are not getting reservation .”
Impressed with his social awareness , I made further enquiries , “ So what will Lalooji do about it ?”
The young guy looked at me incredulously , and said , “ Well I told you na , they are destroying national property because they are not getting reservation . Lalooji being the railway minister could run more trains in the area , add more bogies to the existing trains , so that everybody gets reservation in trains and can travel. This way the railway can earn more revenue by cheating people through the TATKAL service and national property is also saved . So you see everybody is happy .”
Bewildered by his interpretation , I enquired , “ Son , you know what reservation is ?”
“ Yes , uncle , you take reservation so that you get a reserved berth while travelling in a train . Although I think this rule does not apply in Bihar and U.P , where unauthorised people make the reserved persons stand up and take the berth themselves .”
My apprehensions about this kids intelligence disappeared immediately .
Feeling smug , I said “ Your definition about reservation is correct , but these guys were not protesting about Reservations in trains , but Reservations in education and jobs.”
Now it was my young friend’s turn to develop apprehensions about my intelligence . “ Uncle , please explain in detail.”
Explain !!!!! How do you explain something which you yourself are not convinced about .
But having advanced so far , I could not possibly back out.I began , “ Son , Reservations in education and jobs is similar to reservation in trains , except that here you do not reserve berths , but reserve seats in a college and posts in employment on the basis of caste . For example out of 100 seats in a college , you reserve 15 seats for the Scheduled caste (SC) , 7.5 seats for Scheduled tribe (ST) and 27.5 seats for Other Backward Caste (OBC) .” The same applies for jobs in the Government sector too .
“ Caste !! What is that ?” The young man was puzzled , “ I thought all of us were Indians ?”
I was taken aback by this question . Is the kid naïve or what , we are Indians only on the 15th of August and 26th of January , and even half of India ( North East , Naxalite infested areas , Kashmir ) is not Indian even on that day .
Not knowing how to answer to this kid , I decided that silence was the best option under the circumstances . I was not interested in explaining the semantics of Nation State and all such gibberish stuff .
But kids these days , I tell you , are persistent with their queries .“ Uncle , tell me na , what is a caste ?”, the kid persisted .
I was in a soup . How do you explain something which you do not yourself know . I mean , I have never even tried to find out what does the word ‘ Caste’ itself means . Maybe as adults you accept certain things as fait accompli and que sera sera . But here I was, being forced by a kid to enter unchartered area . Now I know how Indiana Jones felt when he entered the Temple of Doom .
Drawing on all the powers of confusing people , I mumbled , “ Er , caste is something you are automatically born into . You are a certain caste the moment you are bought out from your mother’s womb .”
“ I thought we were all born as human beings ,” the kid replied without batting an eyelid.
My mind was now in a tizzy . The kid now seemed like devil incarnate . I should have immediately written his letter , rather than getting into this , I thought .
“ Yes , Yes , but caste decides as to what kind of human being,” I was now getting confused myself .
Sensing my predicament , the kid eased off on the definition bit .“ OK . But my teacher was telling me that according to our Constitution there is no discrimination on the basis of race , religion , caste and all citizens are equal ,” the kid went on .
Teachers , I tell you , why can’t they let kids be kids . Why tell them something which they themselves know is fiction . Chances are that the person became a teacher because reservation blocked all avenues .
“ Yes , that is right , but there is a small difference for reservation which is a special scheme to make up for centuries of oppression on the underprivileged .” I remembered Barkha Dutt saying so, on Television .
“ Ok , but do two wrongs make a right ,” said the kid .By now I was convinced that this guy had the potential to become a great defence lawyer . His ability to grill for information , create chaos in the mind of the opposition was amazing .
“ Uncle , could you tell me about this case in brief , as I read that a number of people had died in the violence and that they had blockaded the capital New Delhi .”
At least the guy was digressing from sensitive issues , I thought and encouraged him further , “ Yes, something else ?”
“ Why are rail lines uprooted and trains stopped from moving?”Clearing my throat like a tenor ,I began , “ The Gujjars who are already under the category of OBC are now demanding the status of ST , which had been promised to them by the C.M. Vasundhara Raje during her election campaign . They are led by Col. Bainsla , and since the Govt. is dithering over the issue , they have started a violent agitation . The people have been killed in police firing and some policemen have also died . In order to make the Govt yield to their demand , they are not cremating the dead bodies and are further uprooting rail links . The Gujjars blockaded the capital to pressurise the Central Govt . The Congress M.P. Sachin Pilot has demanded the resignation of the Rajasthan Govt . on ‘moral grounds’.”
I felt elated over my general awareness .
It was the turn of the kid to look confused . I was now looking towards a peaceful afternoon.
“ But why do the Gujjars want to become S.T , if they already have the benefit of reservation as OBC ? My teacher tells me that the aim of every individual is to move forward in life , and not backwards . Why are they degrading the dead by not cremating them ? Why did the C.M make a promise she could not keep ? My teacher tells me that one should not make a promise one cannot keep . Does Sachin Pilot want the Gujjars to be given SC status or not ?”
Does this kid think that I am a politician or what , so that I know every answer . And the teacher , I wish I could meet up with the guy . The way he is teaching , these kids will end up pretty confused once they grow up and see the reality in this country .
Finding no way out , I continued , “ Gujjars want ST status because once the JATS were given OBC status in 1999 , the Gujjars feel that they may be marginalised by the Jats who are superior in Economic and social status . The C.M made a promise only to buy some votes , which I must tell you is a reality in this country . As for Sachin Pilot , he has not gone on record as to whether he wants ST status for Gujjars or not .”
“ If Jats are superior in social and economic status , why are they given reservation ? So why are Gujjars not being given ST status ? Should a person who lies hold such an important post ? Should Sachin Pilot be not prosecuted for fuelling fire ? If reservation is such an essentiality why not provide it poor people and the really downtrodden , irrespective of caste ?”
The kid had remarkable resilience . I tell you .My answer bank was drying up. Being a typical Indian middle class man I was used to taking up politically correct stands and this was getting uncomfortable . I had stopped talking and thinking about issues such as reservation , appeasement , nationalism et al , ages ago . Now this young guy was driving me into dangerous waters .
“ The Gujjars are not being given ST status because that sector is dominated by the Meenas , who make up the majority of the bureaucracy in India . You take up the list of any Govt. sector and you see the predominance of the Meenas . Both the Central and the State govt feel that antagonising them by increasing another caste in SC category might invite an even more serious backlash . And son , as you will realise later on in life , no influential person in India is ever prosecuted .”
The kid was not finished , “ If the Meenas have advanced so much in life , why are they still getting reservation ? Isn’t there rule of law in India ? Why are the influential not prosecuted ?”
The kids pursuance reminded me of the movie Godzilla , where the fictional character pursued its victims incessantly . “ Maybe Godzilla was not fictional” , I said to myself .
“ Uncle , my teacher told me that Mahatma Gandhi withdrew the disobedience movement because of the Chauri Chaura incident and his non violent methods were instrumental in driving the British away . What happens when a person who is Gujjar is going to appear in an interview , when the rail lines are uprooted or for that matter a Gujjar patient is being taken to a Hospital in an emergency . Will getting the ST status help the aspirant for the missed interview or the man if he dies , untreated ? How does harassing the common man , who may belong to any caste, help in such causes ? How does blockading or uprooting rail routes and highways , which are the lifeline of the nation help anybody . Do we survive , if the nation as such ceases to exist ? Why cannot the Govt ensure quality primary education to all , free of cost to everybody irrespective of religion , race, gender, caste , instead of investing heavily in I.I.T’s , I.I.M’s , so that everybody attains the same level of knowledge . Why doen’t the Government act like the Government ?”
“ Is this what you are going to give us in inheritance , Uncle ?”
Kids being kids , the young lad suddenly switched on the Television set . There in front of us were hundreds of well groomed youths burning vehicles , pelting stones on the Police and creating mayhem .
BOLO BHARAT BOLO

FEAR II

" The only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless ,unreasoning , unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance ."- F. D. Roosevelt , President of U.S.A ,1933.

As you would have realized by now , I am an idle person with totally idle interests (although I think you guys are no better , since you find time to read what I write , but anyway ) . My idea of exertion is to lie down on a couch and watch others work , at times when that becomes too strenuous I go back to sleep , but you know how things are these days , you hardly get to sleep for more than 10 hours at a stretch .

I am also a great Television watcher and watch Television whenever I find time from by busy schedule !! .

One fine winter morning ( actually afternoon , as mornings are for sleeping ) , I was watching World Wrestling Entertainment guys pummel each other , while I sat down and had my 'Mornin Cuppa .

Suddenly, the Ad breaks appeared ( what ingenuity , as if Ad breaks appear after prior warning ) and I saw a guy advertising for a Tea brand . There he sat down with a cup of tea , when a Neta appeared seeking votes . I will not bore with you the details , although I know you stupid guys have nothing better to do , but in brief , our friend , the young chap harassed the Neta with questions like his qualification details , experience et al . The Neta wears a shocking look on his face and is embarrassed to no end . The Ad ended with the punch line , " JAAGO INDIA JAAGO ."

I suddenly felt goose pimples all over the body ( the same way when I thought that a ghost had entered the house through the window , one fine night …..but that is another story ) . I appreciated the cool attitude of the guy and cursed at my fate for not providing me such opportunities .

And then it happened !

I heard my door bell ring and since there was no one at home , and furthermore since I was expecting the Pizza delivery guy ( I simply love Pizzas , they are so fattening and help me in increasing my lethargy ) , I made the painful effort of walking up to the door and opening it .

There stood in front of me the local leader who was standing in the General elections as a candidate of the ruling party . I had seen the guy's photograph on the packet when I had bought Samosas yesterday evening . What luck , I said to myself and pinched myself hard to confirm that I was not dreaming ( you see with my hobby of sleeping , that is the most expected thing ) . No sir ! I was wide awake , and I quickly mumbled a prayer to God in thankfulness .

Let me describe the guy to you people in brief , before proceeding further ( Don't you feel that I can become a good serial director from the way I stretch things ) .

The guy was around Six feet tall , which is around just 12 inches taller than I am , must have weighed around 100 kgs. , had a thick beard , wore a white shirt , white trousers and white sports shoes . A thick gold chain dangled from his neck , a similar bracelet from his wrist . He had the latest version of the mobile phone in his hand ( I knew the version and was desiring to buy it , but you see the exorbitant price was a deterrent ) and the ubiquitous Paan in his mouth . He was surrounded by his friends , who looked like exact replicas of him and were incessantly chatting on their phones . Revolvers were dangling from the waist of a few of them . To tell you guys frankly , for a moment I thought that the wrestlers had walked out of the television set .

My initial reaction was to run at their sight , but then I remembered the JAAGO INDIA ad and the cursing of my fate a few moments back . This was God making up for all the earlier wrongs perpetrated on me , and I could make a hero out of myself . Since a few of the guys from my locality were accompanying them, I could see the opportunity to impress them with my chutzpah ( one of them was the husband of Mrs. Sharma who I had been ogling for quite some time , and this could be my entry pass to their home and ….. , what fun , I thought , I could kill two birds with one stone ) .

The Neta was decency personified , with folded hands and stuff , and his friend started introducing and singing paens in his praise . My mind was working furiously on the way to humble this guy and become a hero figure for Mrs. Sharma and the rest of the locality ( well actually the rest of the locality was on a lower priority ).

Then it stuck me . Since my mind had stopped functioning years ago due to very infrequent use , I decided upon the queries raised by the 'cool guy' in the ad . I instinctively said , " What is your qualification ?" , " Qualification"!!!!! The guy mumbled , and his eyes nearly popped out and he nearly swallowed on his Paan . Mr. Sharma , who till now stood disinterested and was merely making up the numbers reacted as if somebody had pinched his bottom . The rest of the ' friends' of the Neta nearly fainted . There was pin drop silence all around .

" Qualification! ," the Neta repeated , as if I was asking something in Chinese . Sweat appeared on his forehead and he sounded incoherent . Emboldened and in anticipation of an easy victory , I reiterated : "Yes , Qualification" , and then added , " What is your experience ?" By now I could hear the heartbeat of this guy , he was sweating profusely in this chilly morning . Mr. Sharma looked as if he had just seen Count Dracula , in person . The 'friends' looked as if they were part of some funeral procession .

Enjoying my success , I was already looking towards Mrs Sharma's house and could imagine a standing ovation from the rest of the locality . "Experience !" The guy sounded like he had a sore throat . I felt like those HR guys who themselves know nothing , but interview others for recruitments .

"Yes , meaning what have you done till now ."

And then it happened ……… Suddenly , I could see the guy relax , as if had the job .
" Oh , Accha , so say so na!! " Now it was my turn to get puzzled . What do you mean , say so na , I thought . I then repeated my statement , " Yes, experience , " trying to reassert my superiority . This should shut him up , so I thought .
The Neta spat out the Paan and cleared his throat and began :

" 13 Murders , Ten Kidnappings , Running of extortion business throughout the city , Gun Running , Narcotics supply " , not to be left out , his 'friend chipped in , " Netaji , tell him about the bank robbery yesterday ", " Ah yes ", the Neta noted with a sense of pride , " the bank robbery , yesterday, 5.00 crores only ".
Only!! Was the guy talking about a robbery or signing a cheque !!!!
I felt as an earthquake had struck my house and the earth was trembling beneath my feet . Actually , it was my feet trembling . Now it was my turn to sweat . The glee from my face disappeared and my throat felt as dry as the Bundelkhand land during summer. I could see Mr. Sharma turn around and make an effort to flee this rather unholy situation . But then he turned back as watching my predicament seemed much more interesting ( actually his path was blocked by the Neta's friends , who had begun to voice the choicest expletives and had taken out their weapons , as if to retaliate against a terror attack ).
By now , my legs had turned to jelly and my mind had become numb ( it usually is that way , but Today was different ) . I was looking with pleading eyes towards the people of my locality , as quite a crowd had gathered by now . But my locality people seemed much more interested in observing the colour of the sky .
I suddenly heard Mrs. Sharma's window being closed ……..
The Netaji ( I could not refer to him as Neta anymore ) looked like the Great Khali and the Undertaker put together , to me . The great man was smiling away . Suddenly his phone rang , " Yes , Jailor Baboo , Ha Bhai , I will come back tomorrow for some time . See that the Air Conditioner is installed properly in my room . And yes , have you arranged for the Scotch and the ……. You see , I cannot manage without them ".
Then I realized that Netaji was serving a jail term . I was now sweating like a pig and feeling like a lamb to slaughter . My eyes were moist with tears and I could imagine my family members coming back and finding me beaten to pulp . I took solace in the fact that Mrs Sharma might also pay me a courtesy visit . This is what happens with idle mind , bloody well , here I am on the verge of getting lynched and my mind……
God , get me out of this , is all I could think of then . But at times like this, God also develops a sense of humour , and it seemed like end was near . Seeing my situation one the 'friends ' took out a handkerchief and handed it over to me . I nearly fainted at the sight of the 'kerchief . It had blood stains all over . " Not that one , you fool" , Netaji barked at him . Then he turned around and condescendingly addressed me , " You see we met a scooterist on the way , who refused to give way immediately , and these boys taught him a lesson which he will never forget , IF he survives ."
IF !!!!!!
I wanted the earth to open up and swallow me . I started making promises , " God get me out alive and I will never eat Pizza , never watch T.V , Ads …na baba na . Arre I will not even ogle at Mrs. Sharma . " The 'friends ' were by now laughing like Navjyot Sidhu on Laughter challenge .
" Sir , I will vote for you " , is all I could mumble .
" Arre , who wants you to vote . I had come to warn you people not to venture near the polling booth on the election day , because it might not be good for your health " , announced the Netaji.
" Netaji , I have never voted in my life ". Every body turned around at Mr. Sharma who was glowering as if he was going on a date with Malikka Sherawat .
" And you , fat boy " Netaji turned towards me , " You want some more of my qualification?"
I turned my head in negation so vigorously that it is a wonder that it did not fall off .
" Good, so I take your leave and hope you all are satisfied with my qualification to lead you ", " Netaji Zindabad " my locality residents responded . My voice was choked with fear and I merely raised my hand .
Netaji got elected in a landslide and is now a minister at the Centre . I have switched to watching Aastha channel while not ogling at Mrs. Sharma , and Mr. Sharma smirks, whenever he sees me . I have applied to the Election Commission to strike off my name from the electoral role . If Arundhati Roy can give up Indian citizenship and still live in India, so can I .
Moral of the story : : Never believe in what the Americans tell you . Apparently F. D. Roosevelt had never met my revered NETAJI.
SO JAO INDIA SO JAO.

FEAR

FEAR : (noun ) 1. A feeling of disquiet or apprehension.

2. Extreme reverence or awe , as toward a supreme power .

3. A reason for dread or apprehension .

“ The only thing we have to fear is fear itself –nameless , unreasoning ,unjustified , terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance .” – F .D . Roosevelt (President of U.S.A ,during his Ist inaugural address , March 4 ,1933.)

Obviously , the Indian political leadership and the Indian bureaucracy has never heard about President Roosevelt or his famous speech , judging from its recent and the not so recent approach towards the problems staring the country in its face . Ironically Roosevelt was a paralytic person who brought in the policy of New Deal to counter the Great Depression in the 1930’s and stood up against the Japanese and the rampaging German’s in the IInd World War .

Compare this with the recent approach of the country towards Chinese transgressions in the ‘ Finger Tip’ area . This area lies north of the Sikkimese capital of Gangtok and is known so because of its appearance . The Chinese army has warned to demolish structures built for its convenience by the Indian Army , apparently because it refuses to acknowledge the fact that the area belongs to India . Indian response has been typical : “We will resolve the dispute through discussion” , “ minor dispute” , “ we have the longest peaceful border with China” . Even the usually upright ( A rarity these days) Defence minister A. K. Antony , has been silenced by his advisors on this issue .

The FEAR FACTOR which comes into play while dealing with the Chinese is nothing new . Innumerable encroachments into the state of Arunachal Pradesh during the past few years , have gone unresisted . Incidentally , China refuses to acknowledge Arunachal being a part of India , and claims its right over it. And my response to India and China having the longest ‘ peaceful’ border in the world is “ What crap”. Anybody having a semblance of knowledge over the affairs will point out the 90,000 sq. miles of Indian land handed over to Pakistan by the Chinese after grabbing the same in the ill fated 1962 war . Peaceful border indeed !! You have to seek Chinese permission to visit Kailash Mansarovar , the abode of Lord Shiva ( although I admit I cannot prove the existence of Lord Shiva to Buddhadeb Bhattacharya and Kalaingar Karunanidhi ) , as the area was also occupied by the Chinese in 1962 . As recent reports suggest , China has postponed the first two phases of the Kailash Mansarovar yatra this year , ostensibly because of the recent earthquake in China . Pertinent to mention that the earthquake hit areas are thousands of miles away from Kailash Mansarovar . Think a bit deeper , and you will realise that the stated reason is a sham , the real reason lies in trying to browbeat India to suppress the Tibetan activists residing in India , who are determined to oppose the Beijing Olympics , slated for the month of August . Does our leadership have the courage to ask the Chinese leadership to postpone the Olympics , on humanitarian grounds , because of the Earthquake .

FEAR , itself has no logic and is almost like the ubiquitous ghost who your mind feels is hiding in some corner and will come out to spook you in the night.

The best way to overcome fear is to Face it ! Let me narrate an incident to make my point. Legendary revolutionary Bagha Jatin was being chased by a dog during his childhood . The young child ran , terrified and could find no place to hide . Finally his mother noticing his rather helpless position , asked him to turn around and face the dog . The Boy did exactly that , and lo and behold , the dog took to his heels immediately . Incidentally , Bagha Jatin was named so because he once killed a tiger bare handed , in his youth , so much so for fear and its remedy .

Although we blame the Govt. and the policy makers for all the ills surrounding us , do we for a moment ponder as to our responsibility towards the fate surrounding us . The Goonda of the area gradually becomes the corporator , then the M.L.A and if luck and the weakness of the other goondas favour him , the M.P. And what does the common man do ………..Just watch !! we simply watch without uttering a word , because we are too afraid to raise our voice . Let alone a voice in front of the Goonda , we refuse to talk about Reservation in education and Govt. service , terrorism , communal politics being played out for the sake of votes . If you do not believe me , raise the issue of communal politics in front of a mixed gathering and watch the reaction of the people . Most of the ‘intellectuals’ remain absolutely silent over the topic whereas the ‘secularists’ go to war in favour of it .

As Martin Luther King once said –“ The ultimate tragedy of mankind is not the brutality of the few , but the silence of the many .”

Talking of communal politics , one of the recommendations of the Sachar committee with regard to Muslim teachers to be put in position in educational institutions located in areas of Muslim concentration of population .As per the sample survey presumably carried out by the committee , only one in twenty five students enrolled in higher education at the undergraduate is a Muslim ; and one in fifty students enrolled at the post graduate level is a Muslim . Therefore as a remedial measure to improve the percentage of Muslim students , the committee has recommended to post muslim teachers in areas of high muslim population .

What next , my dear countrymen , opening of Madrasas instead of I.I.T !! The painful part is that the ‘intellectuals’ of the country prefer to remain silent because of the FEAR of being branded ‘communal’. This step is at par with the MORLEY MINTO reforms , which introduced the separate electorate system in 1909 . The separate electorate system meant that Muslims could vote for Muslim candidates in constituencies which were earmarked for Muslims only . Herein lay the seeds of a future Pakistan . The Congress which initially opposed the step to divide the country on communal lines , acceded to it after the Lucknow pact of 1916 . The results are there for all to see . Similarly, our leaders simply wilted before Jinnah and the Muslim League after the mayhem of Direct Action day . No body had the courage to stand up for the sake of the nation .

The regressive recommendations of the Sachar committee will only increase the ghettoisation of the Muslims in the country , and instead of bringing them into the mainstream , will further alienate them , as such ideas of Muslims teaching Muslims flies in the face of concept of a Secular society . And by a Secular society , I mean a truly secular society and not the one being propagated by our politicians , which is nothing else but Appeasement for the sake of votes . Tomorrow , the demand might be raised for separate teachers for Muslims in I.I.T , I.I.M etc. ,Muslim officers to report to Muslim superior , separate Muslim banks …………. The country can ill afford the fear over speaking out against this regressive and patently obnoxious idea . Acceding to such recommendations is akin to laying the seeds of another Partition . Is the country willing to stand up ?

The FEAR factor comes out openly in our relations with Pakistan . A country which was brought into existence by dividing the motherland , with which we have fought four bloody wars , which believes in ‘bleeding us through a thousand cuts’ and which continues to remain hostile to our existence , and pray tell me what our response is . The foreign minister is now embarking on a peace mission and as a confidence building measure India has released thousands of Pakistani fishermen incarcerated in Indian jails . Confidence building measure , Mr. Foreign Minister !! How about bringing thousands of Indians killed in bombings by you know who , back to their families , how about bringing back the dead Lance Naik of the Indian army whose wife openly broke down while accepting the gallantry award , before the President recently. How about bringing back the youth , who gave up their lives at the heights of Tiger Hill, Drass , Kargil.

This lack of confidence and the increased Fear factor coming from a nation of warriors is perplexing . Remember Hari Singh Nalwa , the general of Maharaja Ranjit Singh , who , though mortally wounded , stood on the ramparts of his fort , to convince the invading Afghans that he indeed was alive . The Afghan reaction : They took to their heels at his sight . Or for that matter Guru Teg Bahadur , who preferred to be cut into two by a saw , rather than change his faith . I will not comment on the identity of the perpetrator of the crime as the idea is to talk about valour and not cowardice .

Maybe the education introduced by Macualy has a very big role to play in the country loosing its self confidence . The idea of the British was to take away all aspects of the glory of the country in order to propagate the myth of the “ white man’s burdren”. This was later on accentuated by the likes of Nurul Hasan , who under the due patronage of the Government of India gave a slant to the History of the country which suited the ruling Govt. Only a few personalities were given their due ( or more than their due , in certain cases) , whereas the inconvenient personalities were conveniently weeded out . For instance let us share our knowledge about Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose , Sardar Patel or for that matter Chandra Shekhar Azad .. I bet most of us have no idea who Bagha Jatin was and what was his contribution to the freedom movement . Master da Surya Sen anybody ??? Resultantly , The youth of the country has limited role models . Half of them have left their country to seek their fortune abroad , the remaining are either apathetic or have joined hands with the bounty seekers in the country .

The hope of any country lies in its youth and the common man . The fear gnawing amongst them against speaking the truth , standing up for their Fundamental Rights , fear of the Goonda next door or the politician far away ( who incidentally was once his neighbour ), is sapping away the country of its energy , and working like White Ants on the foundation of the country .

Who better to turn around to for encouragement at this hour other than Swami Vivekanand , Who said:

“ HAVE NO FEAR , FEAR IS DEATH , FEAR IS SIN , FEAR IS HELL , FEAR IS UNRIGHTEOUSNESS , FEAR IS WRONG LIFE .”

The common man and the youth has to arise . Let the conch of Lord Krishna and its sound against Injustice , Fear , Falsehood , reverberate throughout this nation of ours. Like the Arjuna of Mahabharata , the Arjuna of today ( the Youth ) has to overcome his fear and stand up for the sake of Truth and Justice .

DO WE HAVE IT IN US ?

NEGATIONISM

Negationism is a word which is not easily defined in the dictionaries . The Best definition of the word comes from the Belgian scholar Koenraad Elst:
"Negationism means the denial of historical crimes against humanity. It is not a reinterpretation of known facts, but the denial of known facts. The term negationism has gained currency as the name of a movement to deny a specific crime against humanity, the Nazi genocide on the Jews in 1941-45, also known as the holocaust (Greek: fire sacrifice) or the Shoah (Hebrew: disaster). Negationism is mostly identified with the effort at re-writing history in such a way that the fact of the Holocaust is omitted."
Cut the story to Jaipur , Yesterday , the 13th of May 2008 .Serial blasts throughout the city claim at least 63 lives ( we all know the authenticity of these official figures ) , but the intent in this write up is not with regard to Statistics , for even one life lost in this horrific violence is terrible, as we are talking of human lives and not mere numbers , although the reaction from the media points otherwise .Apparently , for the mainstream media in the country , such incidents mean , " the more the merrier ". More lives mean gory details ,more pictures , more bytes and stuff.
A list of such bombings throughout the country during the past couple of years includes , Hyderabad , Ajmer , Varanasi , Mumbai , Samjauta Express , Malegaon ! Such a Pan Indian stretch . And our response , you better tell me , has even a single perpetrator of such violence ever been caught . If perchance somebody is accidentally apprehended (accidentally , because if our agencies were vigilant, such acts would be minimised, if not eliminated , in the first place ) , do our security agencies ever obtain any leads which saves a future incident of such magnitude . After every blast or attack the same rigmarole is followed : The P.M and his Govt. express outrage , The C.M of the concerned state blames the Centre for not providing timely intelligence on the attack, An ex-gratia payment is announced , The Centre then retaliates and says that the state was informed , which is then challenged by the State Govt. Everybody then gets together and blames Pakistan , Huji , Lashkar-e -Toiba , SIMI , in case Muslims make up the majority of the victims ( Malegaon ) , snide remarks about Hindu fundamentalists being involved is also raised . Do not trust me !! Sample the findings of the Banerjee commission set up by Laloo Yadav to enquire into the Godhra incident . Evidently the commission arrived at the conclusion that the passengers first misbehaved at the Godhra railway station and then set the compartments on fire from inside !!!!!! Need anything be more said after this ingenuity . Could NEGATIONISM be anything different than this . The facts are infront of us , but like ostriches ,we prefer to bury our head in sand .
Compare our actions (or inactions , whichever pleases you ) , with the Israeli policy of an retribution . After the massacre of its athletes at the Munich Olympics in 1972 , the P.M Golda Meir authorised her secret services to hunt down the perpetrators , who belonged to the Black September group ( very closely connected with that epitome of Indian ' friend ' Yasser Arafat ) , wherever they were hiding in the world . Succed they did . Whatever the issues about morality of such actions be , atleast a message is sent down to these beasts that a price will have to be paid for every life of our citizens .
But the policy of Appeasement has been engrained in our system to such an extent ( its supporters call it the policy of ahimsa ) that our present P.M refused to blame Pakistan after one such recent incident , and went on to say that " Pakistan was as much a victim of terrorism as we where ". Negationism anybody !!
Mulayam Singh Yadav refused to categorise SIMI as a terrorist organisation , just a couple of years back. At this instant , all reports indicate that " sleeper cells " , who perpetrate such terrorist acts , are invariably provided logistical support by SIMI . The "sleeper cells" are more often than not made up of foreign recruits , and cannot act without local support , for safe houses ,reconnissance of the proposed place of attack , getaway after the act , and this is where SIMI comes in . Patriots indeed !
I wonder how many of us remember the look alike of Osama -bin -Laden , who moved around with Ram Bilas Paswan during the previous Assembly elections in Bihar , seeking votes in his favour . What to say about punishment , Paswan is at present a cabinet minister (which he was even then ). Not a word was uttered by our "secular " media .
The same 'secular' media personalities blame Narendra Modi for creating terrorists via the Gujarat riots . Be so as it may , I wonder whether anybody can explain the incidences which took place during an India - West Indies one day match which took place in Srinagar in 1983 . India had just won the world cup and during the match , Anti India and Pro Pakistan slogans rent the air from all corners of the ground . Indian players were heckled and the West Indians applauded . Spectators carried Pak flags. And all this in the presence of Shaikh Abdullah , the then C.M and strongman of Kashmir . Explanations , anybody ! By the way , does the name of Bhindranwale , Yasin Malik ,ring a bell .
A country where 250,000 of its citizens (Kashmiri Pandits ) are ethnically cleansed and made a refugee in their own country without so much as a whimper and we have the nerve to talk of Gujarat making terrorists . By the same analogy why did not one of 250,000 , Kashmiri Pandits turn to terrorism . will somebody get Pravin Swamy ( scholar for The Hindu ) to respond .
Huji has its origins and base in Bangladesh . Imagine the state of our national policies when a country which came into existence because of us is now an active member of the Pak policy of " bleeding India through a Thousand cuts ". This country had the temerity to hang our B.S.F. personnels like animals after killing them after an ambush in ' our land '. PETA will not allow animals to be hung in that manner. Our response ; OUTRAGE , A border meeting and not a word from Shabana Azmi and her brigade .
Talking of responses , let me remind you that our Govt. is still unable to hang Afzal Guru (remember the Parliament attack.......well family members of persons killed in the attack do !) . All the 'liberalists' and the 'secularists' have ensured that the murderer (Supreme Court has announced its verdict and I will call him a murderer only , decency be damned ) is still 'breathing' easy . In fact they are now appealing for his release . As a song goes " It happens only in India.....". The claim is that the man is innocent and has been framed by the security forces , inspite of the overwhelming evidence based on which the Supreme court gave its verdict .
Does NEGATIONISM need any further evidence .
What to talk of Govt. policies . The way Shahrukh Khan kept on dancing during the I.P.L match , after the News of the blasts and deaths were public , was Disgusting , to put it mildly . Admittedly life should and must carry on , for that is the best way of responding to these terrorists . But Mr. Khan , atleast have some respect for the dead . Life might carrry on for you and your ' friends' , but for the dead and their dependents , IT IS ALL OVER ...........
Mr. Khan , I believe this country deserves an apology for your extremely graceless and insensitive act , which have been observed by millions on T.V.
But what to say of these 'rich' people, who anyway engage bodyguards for their children , the response of the common man is even more pathetic. Not a word in protest , one good night of T.V., watching " Breaking News : 100 dead", a few heated discussions , and the next day , back to the normal routine and " they should not put these picture on the front page , bad for the Kids ". While a Kid has just been made fatherless in the blast. So much for concerns !!
WE THE PEOPLE cannot let these terrorists hijack our lives with fear . Let us all resolve that this country will not bow down before these terrorists . We cannot wait for the Govt. to act and have to ensure that they are ' proactive ' and not ' reactive' . WE will not give up .
I bow my head in respect to the dead of Jaipur yesterday and those before them at Hyderabad, Malegaon, Mumbai, Parliament , Varanasi...............
As Chanakya said , centuries ago : UTTHISTHA BHARATA ( Arise India ) .

RAJ KA SWARAJ

OPEN LETTER TO RAJ THACKREY
Respected Shri Raj Thackrey ,
Salutations.
I write this letter to show my regards towards your effort towards the nation of Maharashtra in general and The city of Mumbai in particular.
While watching a news report on an English channel yesterday ( I know your antipathy towards these English and Hindi news channels, but I also believe in the dictum "keep your friends close ,but your enemies closer still". Hope your followers understand). Anyway while watching the news report , I saw an Advertisement hoarding proudly proclaim " MANSE spray lagao ,Bhaiya macchar door bhagao " (MANSE as in Maharashtra Nav Nirman Sena) . What ingenuity ! Why did somebody not think of it before ? Prasoon Pandey , move over!!
I will reveal a dark secret about myself , hope you do not discard my letter after learning about my ethnicity . Sir , I am a big fan of yours , so I hope you forgive me for this dark chapter of my life. The secret is that I am a Bhaiya ( O God , please let the earth open and swallow me , O the shame is unbearable ) .
I believe that being a Bhaiya is the curse placed upon me for the Wrongs of my earlier life , but what to do now . After appreciating the great Ad placed by your party in my mind ( you see my family and friends also belong to the same clan , and I have to bear with them ) , I started shifting channels ( you see , I am a useless man, and have so much of time to waste over petty things ...............No ! No! sir , please do not misunderstand ....)
So I came across a movie channel showing a movie SHAHEED (Darned hindi movie. Wonder why your Bhabhi produces Hindi movies . Good that you have left them ). The sequence was wherein the Revolutionaries like Bhagat Singh , Chandra Shekhar Azad , Rajguru were singing a song , which went like--"......Koi Punjab se , Koi Maharashtra se , Koi U.P se hai , Koi Bengal se. Teri Pooja ki Thali Mein laye Hain Hum , Phool Har Rang Ke , Phool Har daal ke ..... Aye Watan , Aye Watan."
Since my Marathi is very poor ( I learn Marathi from your enlightening posters , but the only words I have picked up are Maaro , Bhagao ,Kaato ,but I hope to learn more such words soon ) , I would again seek your forgiveness , and make a rough English translation (being a Bhaiya my English too is very poor ) . The song talks of national integration and obesiance to Mother India. National integration , is it ? Served those guys right....Get real guys! But what made my blood seeth with anger was the equating of Maharashtra with the rest of the states , especially U.P. How dare they ? Now you know why these guys failed !
I was on the verge of breaking the T.V set but since I had bought home a D.V.D of a Marathi movie of Dada Kondke , wiser counsel prevailed . Sir, not for a moment do I believe my friends when they say that Dada's movies are full of double meaning dialogues only , in the similar way as I do not believe that your Benevolent self (salutations again) is faking this Hungama to save your finished political carrier and develop a vote bank to have a bargaining chip after the upcoming Assembly elections . This is the problem with these Bhaiyas , always casting aspersions on the benevolence of others. Always talking of Politics only .
Speaking of movies , I wish you really throw this man, Amitabh Bachchan out of Mumbai. Imagine a Bhaiya ruling over the Film Industry. How shameful can life be? They call him the most recognised man in India , the face of Indian films , Unique national integration in his home ( Father-A poet, Mother - Punjabi , Wife- Bengali , Son-in -law- Punjabi, Daughter-in law- Southie) . Arre baba what is this , a family or a Khichdi. No purety in the family, I tell you . What will the Marathi Manoos learn from them , you tell me ......... I really do not know why your Uncle invited him to unveil your nephew's debut album . Good that you have left him.
Why only the Bachchan's ,throw out the Kapoor's , The Chopra's , The Johar's, The Bhansali's , The Khan's (except Salman, he like me, supports you ) and the rest of the lot. Spoiling the whole place with their fantasies. The treatment they give to Marathi actors is disgusting . I still remember Sachin's role in SHOLAY , imagine such a long movie and Sachin plays a dead body for a few seconds. But we all must appreciate that he infused life into the character. Well if your Uncle was as energetic as you we would have been saved the ignominy of listening to Kishore , Mukesh, R.D Burman ,his father S.D and watching movies of Guru Dutt , Dilip Kumar, Dev Anand ,Hrishikesh Mukherjee . Spoil the entire culture, these guys did, but why cry over spilt milk.
Actually , this ethnicity should have been imposed even earlier , but what to do, Chattrapati Shivaji with his call for Hindvi Swaraj( Indian and not Hindu Swaraj) , Bal Gangadhar Tilak with his quest for freedom from the British , Baba Saheb Ambedkar with his desire for the uplift of the socially oppressed, did not have your Intellect, neither your Wisdom ,nor Vision( I will hit anybody who says 'political opportunism' ).
Going back to your vision of Maha for Marathi (somebody informs me that Hitler too wanted a Germany for Germans , but I do not listen to these History guys anyway. They only talk of learning from History to avoid the same mistakes in future. But I am sure even you do not study History, so what mistake , what learning. Ignorance is bliss , they say.) , let us first throw out the Gujratis , led by that family ,The Ambanis. Imagine a petrol pump attendant, earning so much money and making a 28 storey house (biggest in the World they tellme) . What if they provide employment to so many people and stuff . They do not belong and out they go.
These bhaiyas have even infiltrated the Police force . The top encounter specialist Pradeep Sharma is a Bhaiya and even his sidekick Daya Naik was a Southie . They have made sure that the Mumabai ATS (Anti Terrorist Squad ) chief , is a bhaiya. Making Mumbai a violent place ,Aren't they? Send them back.
I am glad that you have received tremendous support for your policies from the Marathi Manoos . Look at Sachin Tendulkar , Lata Mangeshkar, not a word in protest!! There is a saying in Sanskrit that staying silent , means tacit acceptance . I believe that the great Nana Patekar has come out in open support for you , just please tell him to stop acting in Hindi Films , as my friends make fun of me for this hypocricy ( they say so , not me). And please do send some your Goons......ooops.... followers to thrash Sachin for naming his team the MUMBAI INDIANS and not MUMBAI MARATHAS. Has he gone insane or what?
And Sir, not for a moment do I believe my Bhaiya friends when they compare your divine policies with ethnic cleansing in Kashmir, after all that was the handiwork of the I.S.I (your uncle used to say so ) and you Sir , are no...............
Regards and salutations
JAI RAJRASHTRA , MOVE OVER BHARAT RASHTRA.

TERI POOJA KI THALI MEIN LAYEIN HAIN HUM , PHOOLHAR RANG KE PHOOL HAR DAAL KE......... AYE WATN , AYE WATAN............